Ponders.

You know how you can ponder something, and that is called pondering? Like pondering your thoughts. Well, I think that a collection of thoughts should be called 'Ponders.' So, here are some recent ponders.

This week is extremely long. Also short. Its already Thursday, and it was just Monday. BUT, so much has happened in this one week, that when I go back and think about it, it almost makes me want to clonk myself on the head and knock myself out. I don't like thinking about how much has gone on. What is it with high school and drama? And friends? And not knowing what to do, until you get so confused and frustrated and angry and sad that you can't even function, and you spend the whole school day just doodling in the back of your notebooks? There is only one plus to that. And that is that some pretty great doodles come from it. Thats it. No body likes being 'confrangrad.' Thats a mix of confused, frustrated, angry and sad all mixed (Pronounced 'Con-frang-rad'). Nobody likes that.

In my opinion, High School can be AWESOME, but also, the most lamest thing ever invented. Most guys just get so full of themselves, with their pants down to their mid-calves, and their t-shirts that would be big on Andre the Giant. And those hats that sit HIGH above their foreheads. Whats up with those? C'mon?! And the girls, goodness gracious!! Honestly, its ridiculous how much we care about what we say, what we wear, who we date, who we're friends with, what kind of music you listen too, how much of one subject you should talk about before it becomes obnoxious (i.e Harry Potter, Kate Nash, Britain), how long we should consider what we say to someone before we actually say it, even though when the time comes, we usually forget what we were going to say, and just improv it. I mean, this can get inCREDibly stressful!

Lately, I've been so stressed (Not for just the above posted reasons, others too) that I have been constantly felt sick. For over a month now! Its not actually anything, but its been bringing me down, and keeping me from getting good sleep, and I'm not even eating as much because I've lost appetite. That is BAD, for Kate Kennedy. Food is my favorite thing, and when I don't have the appetite to eat it, it really can bring down a day. Or when I stay up until 2 am cringing with stomach pains. Thankfully I've been getting better sleep lately, but during the day, things get unpleasant.

I think that the most stressful thing in my life right now is how much I think. I think way to much about what to say to a few people in my life, and what not to say, and what I definitely shouldn't say so I don't get teased, and that really is exhausting. Also, I have to think of what to say to friends. Not all of them of course. I'm not one to fuss over clothes and hair and makeup and what kind of music I listen to very much, so that's good. Besides, everyone knows what kind of music I listen to already. KATE NASH. Also others, but she's my favorite British Buddy. The only thing I really spend my time thinking and stressing over is how to talk to people. Especially adults. I don't ever want to be offensive, and I try to be funny sometimes, and I just have to figure out peoples senses of humor, and if they have one, or if they're sense of humor is just teasing me for what I say. I hate that mostly. It makes me feel like crap. Sure, sarcasm is GREAT. I use it ALL the time, but there is definitely a point where it goes way too far, and thats when it can really make a person feel awful, especially if it comes from an adult you respect and look up too. Even just an adult. It just sucks.

Wow. I kinda poured a lot of crap out into that post.. Sorry about that. I'm debating just deleting it, but it felt great getting it all out. Good luck in your daily lives everyone, I'll post again soon. Maybe later today. Its nice to have my fingers fly across the keyboard letting out every word I can think of. Thanks for following and reading. Love you all!