Future.

I have to take the PSATs this Saturday at 7:30 AM. I do not want to take the PSATs this Saturday at 7:30 AM. I want to be asleep on Saturday at 7:30 AM.

But, alas, I will be taking the PSATs. I can't wait. I just love taking tests where you have to fill in the scantron bubbles and then you get off track and you mess them all up and its just utter chaos. Why can't I just circle the correct answer.

I have to start thinking about College. What one I want to go to, how I will pay for it, or will I get a scholarship? I need a job. I need to save money. Get some means of transportation. Car, motorcycle? I don't know. I need extracurriculars to graduate. I am only in GSA. I don't know if I need more than that. I don't know how to cook, or even use the washer and dryer. How pathetic is that? When I move out, what am I supposed to do? When I move out? I'm going to be 18 in less than a year. I have to think about my future. I have to figure out where I will live, and how I will pay for that. I have to get groceries, health care, insurance. I don't want this stuff in my life. I want to continue making mud pies in the backyard and know my parents have everything under control.

Not anymore though. It's time to take a step up and start taking care of myself...

But I guess there are good aspects of the future as well. Falling in love, for example. I can't wait to fall in love and get married. Have two children and raise them. Hold their tiny bodies in my arms and then watch them grow up and soon enough they will be panicking about the same things I am on this post. I can't wait to get a house with my husband, and find out what career I will choose. Will I end up being a musician? Or will it be an artist? Writer? Illistrator? Or will it surprise me. Will I be a doctor? A lawyer. No. I won't be those things. I can't wait to grow old with my one true love and see where life takes us. Takes me. I don't know what I will do. I am excited to find out, but a little horrified as well. I don't know how I am going to get there, to this life that I write about.

Let's talk about something else a little lighter. Oh, guess what. Once again I am sitting in English class. I am way ahead of schedule on this paper we are writing, and I am tired of pretending to still be editing it, seeing as that was done days ago. I accidentally was put in the average Lit and Comp class, and I belong in Honors. Oh well, it's nice to have a little break. I am exhausted right now. I can't wait for this weekend - well, not Saturday, but Sunday, because I can sleep and sleep and sleep all day long. I need to catch up. Today is Wednesday. On Wednesday's me and my friends all walk downtown after school and hang out down there until dinner time. Plus, on Wednesdays, school ends at 1:00 rather than 2:45. I don't know why, but I love it. It's so short. I am going to go to the Claire's store sometime soon, preferable today, and get a second ear piercing. 40 dollars for both ears. I have a $20 gift certificate for there. So I might as well. I was going to get a nose piercing, but then my friend Janet told me about how when she got hers she almost passed out. They slowly stick a needle through your nose. I am a pansy. I cannot deal with that kind of pain. So instead, I will pierce my ears again, seeing as that is not painful, and fast, with that quick little gun. Thank the Lord.

Class is almost out. Finally. Even though todays classes are 30 minutes long. So easy. It's ridiculous. Still too long though. I might take a nap in Earth Science next period. I used to like science. I guess when I had a cool science teacher it was awesome. But when you have a science teacher who looks like a primitive man and talks about things you've never heard of and he never bothered to explain, you end up not really liking science anymore. Hint, hint - GRADEK, come teach me science here!

I'll talk to you all later. I don't really know if any one even reads this old thing anymore. Whatever. :)