Ponders.

You know how you can ponder something, and that is called pondering? Like pondering your thoughts. Well, I think that a collection of thoughts should be called 'Ponders.' So, here are some recent ponders.

This week is extremely long. Also short. Its already Thursday, and it was just Monday. BUT, so much has happened in this one week, that when I go back and think about it, it almost makes me want to clonk myself on the head and knock myself out. I don't like thinking about how much has gone on. What is it with high school and drama? And friends? And not knowing what to do, until you get so confused and frustrated and angry and sad that you can't even function, and you spend the whole school day just doodling in the back of your notebooks? There is only one plus to that. And that is that some pretty great doodles come from it. Thats it. No body likes being 'confrangrad.' Thats a mix of confused, frustrated, angry and sad all mixed (Pronounced 'Con-frang-rad'). Nobody likes that.

In my opinion, High School can be AWESOME, but also, the most lamest thing ever invented. Most guys just get so full of themselves, with their pants down to their mid-calves, and their t-shirts that would be big on Andre the Giant. And those hats that sit HIGH above their foreheads. Whats up with those? C'mon?! And the girls, goodness gracious!! Honestly, its ridiculous how much we care about what we say, what we wear, who we date, who we're friends with, what kind of music you listen too, how much of one subject you should talk about before it becomes obnoxious (i.e Harry Potter, Kate Nash, Britain), how long we should consider what we say to someone before we actually say it, even though when the time comes, we usually forget what we were going to say, and just improv it. I mean, this can get inCREDibly stressful!

Lately, I've been so stressed (Not for just the above posted reasons, others too) that I have been constantly felt sick. For over a month now! Its not actually anything, but its been bringing me down, and keeping me from getting good sleep, and I'm not even eating as much because I've lost appetite. That is BAD, for Kate Kennedy. Food is my favorite thing, and when I don't have the appetite to eat it, it really can bring down a day. Or when I stay up until 2 am cringing with stomach pains. Thankfully I've been getting better sleep lately, but during the day, things get unpleasant.

I think that the most stressful thing in my life right now is how much I think. I think way to much about what to say to a few people in my life, and what not to say, and what I definitely shouldn't say so I don't get teased, and that really is exhausting. Also, I have to think of what to say to friends. Not all of them of course. I'm not one to fuss over clothes and hair and makeup and what kind of music I listen to very much, so that's good. Besides, everyone knows what kind of music I listen to already. KATE NASH. Also others, but she's my favorite British Buddy. The only thing I really spend my time thinking and stressing over is how to talk to people. Especially adults. I don't ever want to be offensive, and I try to be funny sometimes, and I just have to figure out peoples senses of humor, and if they have one, or if they're sense of humor is just teasing me for what I say. I hate that mostly. It makes me feel like crap. Sure, sarcasm is GREAT. I use it ALL the time, but there is definitely a point where it goes way too far, and thats when it can really make a person feel awful, especially if it comes from an adult you respect and look up too. Even just an adult. It just sucks.

Wow. I kinda poured a lot of crap out into that post.. Sorry about that. I'm debating just deleting it, but it felt great getting it all out. Good luck in your daily lives everyone, I'll post again soon. Maybe later today. Its nice to have my fingers fly across the keyboard letting out every word I can think of. Thanks for following and reading. Love you all!

A LOT have fun has just hit me SQUARE in the face.

So, after we moved to Bend, it was really, REALLY hard to make friends, so then one day, I met a girl named Elle Moore. That was GREAT! She introduced me to her friend Kenzie. Kenzie and I had drama together. That was great. So then there were two other girls that were friends with Kenzie that were also in my Drama class. One of them I had kinda met before, her name was Annie (Psssttt... I don't like code names. I always mess up and forget... heh heh...) and then I also met Maya. Now, this was a good choice in friends, because I could not stop laughing after I met them. Now, they had this huge group of friends that I met from them. So now, I don't sit alone at lunch anymore, and I spend all of lunch discussing Harry Potter, laughing, and its SO fun!! So now, I usually eat with Annie, Kaitlin, Riley, Coleman, Sarah, Hannah, sometimes Maya, hmmm I feel like I'm missing someone.. But maybe I am not. But if I am then I will feel bad.. GAH!! But I am really excited for tomorrow night because we are having a movie night! WOOOOTT!! We are going to watch 50 First Dates. I have never seen it before I don't think. But maybe I have heard of it. Right now I am sitting in my Freshman Acadamy class. Basically, thats a class where you feel like shooting yourself. I should be typing on Microsoft Publisher right now, but hey, we only have like 27 minutes left of class and there is SO much extra room on my brochure. Plus I am almost done. I hate Microsoft. They make boring programs. I like Frame By Frame. Thats a FUN app. Ha ha ha, wait, you don't read my blog to hear me complain. I will stop now. But, trust me, you would want to shoot yourself. I am only getting away with typing this right now because my back pack is hiding the screen, and I am typing fast so it seems like I am typing on my brochure. Which is mostly done. :D Well, this is better than history class! Also GUESS WHAT. My math teacher told me the other day that he entered me into a math competition, and I really wanna win a prize, but I really dont wanna take a timed math test on Wednesday because to me, that just doesnt sound like a load of fun. In fact, it sounds about as fun as pooping your pants. Now THAT doesn't sound like fun does it? So I am debating on doing it. I know that if I do, I get to miss a full day of school, but I do and don't want to do that. I mean, now that I have some friends here (That are by the way, kinda the BOMB!!) I don't really want to miss out on school, but I do want to miss History, Science, Math, Frosh Acadamy, P.E... wait no, FREDDY! AHHAHAHAHA. Oh and I don't want to miss out on Drama. Because Annie and I draw some PRETTTTTTY radical pictures on there. WHAT IS THIS RUMPUS!! Oh yeahhh..